Blog Archives

Depression POINTS To Something More

@Grace2Grow: ‪#‎Depression‬ comes in MANY forms & 4varieties of reasons. For me one big issue: I perceive on an “intuitive” level &struggle 2identify ROOT.

* In fight against #Depression I PREACH 2myself: ‪#‎faith‬ = often NOT understanding. Still, God is pleasd I believ him when I dont FEEL like it.

* #Depression is very real for ALL, tho we like 2deny it. Perhaps bcuz #faith is supposed 2cureall. ‪#‎Jesus‬ IS our hope ESPEC in midst of fire.

* #Depression usually manifests when I’v tried 2TAKE OVR some aspect of my life – 2MAKE sumthin happen. ‪#‎EvidenceImNotYielding2SpiritsLeading‬.

* #Depression is not ALWAYS an indication of a lack of surrender. Sumtimes there’s grief that invades &drowns the voice of Hope. ‪#‎TheGoodFight‬

* More than ever Im persuaded that HOPE gives birth 2FAITH. So when Im battling #Depression I must actively HUNT 4voice of HOPE 2find LIFE.

* My experience = I can “feel” when weight of a #Depression (oppression) lifts. &Always this comes after I express my longing heart in prayer.

* I can KNOW I must pray & give my “groanings” 2God as an offering, BUT in midst of pain it feels like THE most impossible thing! #Depression

* It helps 2make a literal ‪#‎notetoself‬, even a tweet: God is faithful, our feelings lie, #Depression does NOT last forever, our ‪#‎HOPE‬ is sure!

Be BLESSED, Beloved ❤


Reflecting on Fear vs. Faith

Reflecting on Fear vs. Faith ~ some more recent tweets.


  • There is no place in the kingdom of God for ANY fear other than the fear of the Lord. As that is the beginning of true wisdom, its fruit is “perfect love” which CASTS OUT ALL OTHER FEAR.


  • Fear of God, the beginning of wisdom, is the BIRTHPLACE of Faith. But any other fear is an ENEMY of Faith, exposing IDOLS in our hearts.


  • We knowingly &UNknowingly become SLAVES 2being thought well of by others & make costly sacrifices 2obtain their good opinions. #FEAROFMAN


  • Scripture tells us the Righteous walk by FAITH not sight. When we “fear” the unknown, we expose a heart idol: I wish I were “god” of my own life! That is the true “original sin.”


  • “Faith” is not blind bravery. Faith comes by hearing the WORD OF GOD. Do u feel afraid? anxious/worried? My rule 4myself: “Flee 2the Word!”


  • [progression of YIELDING]  ….  I THINK I CAN! -> I thought I could -> I think I can’t -> I know I can’t! -> I think He would? -> I think He can! -> I KNOW HE WILL!


I think there is a future book in these reflections….


Be Blessed!



Building Myself Up in the Lord!

Today has been a very TRYING day! … Calling to mind bits from Ps. 37 (NKJV mixed w/a little of The Message) to keep my mind stayed on HIM who is my Source and my Strength, and my Protection, and my BELOVED!

“…Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land and feed on HIS faithfulness!….Open up before God, keep nothing back…Trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light….Quiet down before God, be prayerful before Him….Do not fret – it only causes harm….Bridle your anger…Those who wait on the Lord, they shall inherit the earth!….THE MEEK SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH, AND SHALL DELIGHT THEMSELVES IN THE ABUNDANCE OF PEACE!”

Ah, thank you, Lord!! ♥

“…A little that a righteous man has is better than the riches of many wicked…the Lord upholds the righteous. The Lord knows the days of the upright, and their inheritance shall be forever…The wicked are moral weaklings, but the righteous are God-strong…They shall not be ashamed in the evil time, and in the days of FAMINE they shall be SATISFIED!…In hard times, they’ll hold their heads high; when the shelves are bare, they’ll be FULL!…The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; for the Lord upholds him with His hand!…The Lord loves justice, and does not forsake His saints; they are preserved FOREVER!….”

“The mouth of the righteous speaks wisdom, and his tongue talks of justice….[He] chews on wisdom like a dog on a bone, rolls virtue around on his tongue. His heart pumps God’s Word like blood through his veins!…None of his steps shall slide….Wait on the Lord, and keep His way….Wait passionately for God, don’t leave the path. He’ll give you your place in the sun while you watch the wicked lose it….Mark the blameless man, and observe the upright; for THE FUTURE OF THAT ONE IS PEACE!…The salvation of the righteous is from the Lord; HE IS THEIR STRENGTH IN THE TIME OF TROUBLE. And the Lord shall help them, and deliver them….And save them, because they trust in Him!…The spacious, free life is from God, it’s also protected and safe. God-strengthened, we’re delivered from evil – when we run to HIM, He saves us!”

Godly Friends to Encourage

Life has been very abusive of late.  The last several weeks, perhaps made worse in part because of the holidays, I have been “magnifying” fear instead of “magnifying the Lord” by faith.

Still, God was gracious to intervene – in this case with the patient and persevering counsel of a couple godly friends who kept pointing me back to truth.  Here are some of their encouragements:

  • Sometimes surrounding yourself with endless preaching and reading of “Christian” books and even devouring Scripture ~ this can be so much self-righteous beating your head against a brick wall!  [Not to diminish the Word!  This was said for my sake, because I tend to go overboard on all that “doing” ~ Yes, the Word is the SWORD, but I am more apt to wield it as a battering ram – perhaps especially on myself – rather than letting the LORD wield it as a scalpel, applied with grace-filled anesthetic ;).]
  • You really need to be singing Praise and Worship! ~ like when Israel would call on the Musicians before going into battle, and the LORD wins the victory.  It invites the presence of God into your experience and necessarily puts you in a place to “fix your eyes on Christ.”
  • If there are no physical explanations, as yet, have you considered the possibility that you’re under “attack” spiritually?  and/or making yourself sick because you’re not fighting the fight of FAITH?
  • If you’re so full of self-preservation and frustration/anger, how can you expect to lovingly pray as you ought?  Selfishness and selflessness cannot live together in the same space!
  • You need to REST.  You need to KEEP the Sabbath ~ that means rest IN it.  It takes *humility* to stop and even just sleep ~ it means you’re not always in control, and God likes to remind you of that so you trust HIM completely.
  • Stop trying to “figure everything out!”  You aren’t meant to; that’s why we are to be LED by the Spirit!  And how can you HEAR him if every quiet space in your life is filled up with DOING?
  • You are MORE than a conqueror in Christ!  Like Ali, when he would win a major fight, and he’d go home with the prize money, and Mrs. Ali would say Thank you! and put the money in the bank?  SHE was MORE than a conqueror! ~ Ali fought the fight, but SHE got the spoils of his victory!

These are all still percolating.  🙂

That we may be Forever with HIM!!

Remembering and celebrating God’s active, pursuing us, even though we are by nature – because of sin – objects of his wrath, he intervened and came by human flesh yet w/o sin, so he could die in our place, and rise again to secure our Eternal Life!


Because of HIS eternal, unfailing LOVE! To prepare a place for us WITH him enjoying the presence of the very God by whom and for whom we were made, forever!

Manger -> Cross -> Throne …

Merry CHRISTmas!

I pray, for your joy and his glory, that you embrace the Christ of Christmas, now and forever!! ❤


…They Do Not Wear Boxing Gloves

“People filled with the Holy Spirit should be marked with the true features of witnesses. They neither dither nor dogmatize. They are sure of their aim but are not arrogant. They have the cool assurance of knowing that two plus two equals four with no need to prove it – no polemics. They are passionate but not pushy (with a few exceptions). They let the truth speak for itself, no browbeating people into submission. They do not wear boxing gloves. The preaching formula is always ‘thus says the Lord,’ not ‘I’m telling you!’ Witnesses just pass on what they had heard and saw. It is not their business to defend it or even to invite questions. It is the Lord’s responsibility to confirm the righteousness of His own Word.”

~Reinhard Bonnke


What a beautiful quote!

I confess, I have spent the better part of my life aspiring to more knowledge, particularly spiritually, and desiring to convey that discovered “truth” to any and all I could.  Sometimes this looked like spiritual fervor, sometimes this took the form of evangelistic frenzy, sometimes it felt like academic zeal, and always it represented my deep and abiding desire to KNOW GOD and to see as many others come savingly to the knowledge of him, also…..And being a Philosophy major in college only fueled my passion for the DEBATE!  I loved to be RIGHT, and to PROVE I was right (to the degree I would even now say that “being right” is one of my most dominating heart idols!).  I was convinced this was what it looked like to “love the Lord my God with all my *mind*!”

Even though I desired that others might be saved, it was still colored by my feeling the need to fight to persuade (which had very little about it a *heart* of love, at least that any of my would-be listeners could discern).

So more recently, with the advent of some of the “discoveries” (RE-discoveries?) I’ve been making by God’s grace over the past year, I am becoming more consciously aware of what the Apostle Paul means, in the letter to the Colossians, to “let the peace of Christ RULE in your hearts” ~ and it is this very peace that I think Brother Bonnke is referring to above, when he talks about that “cool assurance” of disposition.  Akin to when Paul also says in Philippians that our “gentleness” should be evident to all…..

I have had many occasion to *fail* in how I’ve lived by or displayed this peace, or gentleness, or cool assurance.  I am definitely not “mature” in this area, yet.  But just hearing these words sends a thrill to my heart, and I know it is that to which I am aspiring, and it is the FULLNESS of this that I am convinced the Lord is working in my own heart (yes, *heart*)….and it is the overflow of these “meditations of my heart” that I hope will increasingly characterize the “words of my mouth.”

Jesus was full of grace AND truth ~ too long I’ve felt compelled to *prove* the truth, when all I’ve needed to do is stand on it.  If anything, perhaps I ought to look at this as a way of *proving* grace? not in a “straining effort” kind of way, but just in terms of being *intentional* about living forth from the grace of Christ, and I can only do that if I am totally immersed in it….in HIM.  And I can trust the Lord to *prove* himself when it comes to the “truth” of who he is… very freeing!

Lord, I’m hanging up my gloves.  🙂